Why is it that we all love those feelings we get in the pit of our stomachs we call “butterflies”?
Does it make us feel alive? loved? remembered? important?? What is it about those feelings leave us elated and craving more?
I remember getting butterflies when I was in middle school, when I would simply walk by a cute boy in the hall. My pearly whites would flash and my face flushing as I scurried on by, hoping he didn’t see me looking at him.
Over the years, the butterflies returned during different times. Holding hands. Getting winked at. Being flirted with. Kissing. Teasing. Starting a new job. Looking forward to a date. Being on a great date. Watching a love story on film. Thinking about my future. Singing along to a new song on the radio that hits home. Remembering old times…. and the list could go on and on…
Why is it that when it comes to boyfriends, the butterflies that you once got when your hand brushed his, slowly fade over time? Hand holding doesn’t do it anymore, and we crave that old feeling again, so we move on to kissing, and when kissing doesn’t work, we move on to doing more. Is that feeling really worth losing yourself in a moment?
I say no. I have definitely played with fire before, and caved with the pressures of doing things I never saw myself doing, because of that high feeling I got when my stomach felt like it was tied in knots. There were times I was positive I was going to burst from the inside out if I didn’t scream with excitement, or go out and run around until the energy had been drained from my every cell. You’ve gotta know that feeling… you know, you’re smiling from ear to ear, and you cant even think straight.
Anatomically and medically, the feeling is most likely explained by our bodies sending out a rush of adrenaline. The body’s sudden effort to redistribute blood to the parts of the body that are needed the most when in a crisis (mainly the brain and the large muscle groups), the body shuts down blood flow to less critical areas (like the stomach and skin). The sensation in the stomach is the result of that decrease in blood flow.
But what I ponder, is why in the world do we crave that tingle and those goosebumps? Why must we feel those things when with someone else? To get a ‘connection’ with that other person, or a ‘spark’ that something is going right?
I can admit that I am an addict of the tingle. I have based feelings solely on whether or not I got goosebumps or felt a ‘spark’ with the guy I was with. My best friend Andy never gave me that spark after sophmore year, so I wrote him off as a possible future dating candidate. And all the stupid boys that came into my life that gave me even the slightest tingle, had a first class ticket to my heart… All because I felt something different???
The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. I am aware and admitting to the obvious problem I have before me… basing a potential relationship on the lack of blood flow to my less-than-vital organs. But even if I take the first step, how to I move forward and begin to fix myself of this? Its not like I can tell my body to stop reacting the way it does… Thats physically impossible!
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….So does that mean from this moment forward, I am supposed to think more with my head, and less with my heart?
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